we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
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