Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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