I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize