Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
Randomize