I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
i out mim tonsoeep
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