We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
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