yo i have your phone
... oh so you probably won't get this message
How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
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i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
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