'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
Randomize