Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The struggles of a small town man whore
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
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