He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
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