What a fucking waste of an outfit
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
*swallows 40 gallons of heavy water and astral projects into buzzfeed* Top Ten Reasons Why I Am God
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Randomize