girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
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