I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
I smell stomach acid.
do herpes really smell.
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
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