bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
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