got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
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