God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
Randomize