I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
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