you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
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He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
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We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
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