I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
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We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
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