White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's been two dates and she just invited me to her aunts funeral. I can't even. Who the fuck does that? I need to drink I'm coming to get you in 5
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
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