Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
Randomize
