i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
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