Wow.. I was doing a mental check of my bank balance & I literally just said to myself: 'I have 27 dollars and a bottle of tequila til tuesday-ill be fine'
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
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