just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
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