whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
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