I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
AHHHHHHHHH. I LEFT A GLASS NEXT TO ME WHEN I FELL ASLEEP I'M SO SURE IT WAS WATER BUT NOW IT'S VODKA JESUS MADE A STOP
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
Dude I got in an Uber this morning and he goes “I drove you last night”\n“You got your dick sucked in the back seat”
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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