so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize