did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
Randomize