sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
I promise not to pretend to be Jesus and take the wheel. But to my credit you shouldn't be saying that while I'm that drunk and we are in a car.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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