Christians are straight up FREAKS
I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
I woke up this morning next to some guy. I was horrified, he woke up and said, "the white tiger strikes again!"
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
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