Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
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I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
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Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
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