I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
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