I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize