Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
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