I'll bet she douches with gravy.
Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize