Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
Randomize