i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
