nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
My boss asked me to pass over one of my business cards and instead I had condoms fall out of my wallet, how’s your day going??
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
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