Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
Randomize