would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Naked Twister starts at high noon
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
Randomize