They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
I'm a teacher who's always telling kids about the importance of due diligence, yet I'm eating an avocado out of a coffee filter because I'm too lazy to wash dishes
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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