Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
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