I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
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