Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
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