i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
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