So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
Randomize