I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
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