he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
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