You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
apparently the secret to your success is patron
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
Randomize