I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
50% drunk capacity currently
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize